The Road

I have to make a confession. I am fiction-challenged.

What do I mean by that? I mean that I struggle reading fiction. I fall asleep. I get bored. I lose interest. I fall asleep.

I have come to realize that reading fiction is an odd kind of spiritual discipline for me. It is a "spiritual discipline" because I must intentionally engage my imagination with fiction. I discover rest when I let myself step away from non-fiction books and works.

This morning, I woke up and thought, "I need to finally read Lord of the Rings." I read The Fellowship of the Ring 6+ years ago but I only made it through 1/4 of The Two Towers. I never picked up the books again. My friend shared his Lord of the Rings DVDs with me but I couldn't put them in today because I felt the pull to read the books.

I lost myself in Book One of The Fellowship of the Ring today. I enjoyed every second of it and I STAYED AWAKE! I remembered why I was captivated by Tolkien's great work years ago. One reason that stands out more than any other is Frodo's sense of calling and his struggle with the calling that was thrust upon him.

In many ways, I feel that in my calling as a full-time church pastor. I know that it is what God has called me to but I sometimes think and feel "why me?"... I feel like God has set me on a path that I didn't choose for myself but now that I am walking on that path I wouldn't choose any other.

At one point, Frodo shares the following as he walked along with Sam and Pippen:

The Road goes ever on and on
Down from the door where it began.
Now far ahead the Road has gone,
And I must follow, if I can,
Pursuing it with weary feet,
Until it joins some larger way,
Where many paths and errands meet,
And whither then? I cannot say.

I am on The Road and I feel like I will be joining some larger way. Yes, "where many paths and errands meet and wither then? I cannot say."