Prayer of the Heart

I am learning more and more about the rhythms of my brain during my time at PTS. This year has proven to be a significant challenge with the combination of being a husband, a dad, a future dad of two (baby #2 is due in 2 weeks), a student, an intern, and sometimes a friend... I have been working through some energy management 'practices' with my mentor at PCNP but I am far from consistently practicing them (as I write on this blog when I should be going to sleep). One way that I have learned to relax is by a reading non-school book at night before I go to bed.

I decided to pick up a classic that I have heard about from numerous friends, mentors, and my wife - The Way of a Pilgrim. I was re-introduced to this book a few weeks ago when I led the Gathering @ PCNP in the Jesus Prayer (prayer of the heart most often associated with the Eastern Orthodox tradition). I decided to incorporate this prayer in my life, especially when I could sense that my body was being taken over by stress or anxious thoughts. The basic form of "Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on me" is prayed by praying the first part "Lord Jesus Christ" when inhaling and "have mercy on me" when exhaling. I started to do this as a means of the prayer of the heart. The longer version of "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner" was introduced to me last year in Inquiring After God (TH 291) and I have used this longer version as well.

One quote from the book resonated with me when the pilgrim said in response to his time in jail, "All that had happened seemed not to affect me; it was as if I had watched someone else being treated. And when they flogged me, the Prayer strengthened and consoled me and I was oblivous to everything."

I haven't been jailed or flogged but I have experienced this sense of watching my circumstances from afar when I have experienced the peace of Christ in my life. I haven't sensed this recently but maybe as I jump into more times of the interior prayer I may start to experience the "peace that transcends all understanding" that I have often meditated on in Philippians 4:6-7.