Matching Feelings

I am sitting in the hospital room where Carys was born last night at 10:08 PM. I am looking at her as I type and she is wrapped up in blankets and peacefully sleeping.

At 10:08 PM last night, I felt a feeling that I felt a month ago. I couldn't put my finger on exactly why I felt the same way but then I started to connect the dots.

Last month, I attended a pastor's conference at North Point Community Church. The Friday night session included a communion worship service with an intense set of music accompanied by an artist on stage painting Jesus. I remember receiving the bread and cup and then beginning to cry as I was overwhelmed by the reality of God's grace in my life. Grace. A surprise gift. God's unmerited favor. Grace.

I wept because I felt overwhelmed with gratitude for God's action in my life and for the world in Jesus' death on the cross and resurrection from the dead. I was knocked over by God's grace.

Last night, I felt the same exact feeling and it led to the same action, namely, crying by the bed where Carys was resting on Laurie. I heard her little cries and I saw her little brown eyes looking at me and I was overwhelmed again with gratitude for God's gifts in my life. I do not deserve such a gift but God has seen it fit to bless me with another little girl. That is God's grace.

I cried in two different places for what seemed like two different reasons. In fact, I cried for the same reason - a joyful response of gratitude for God's grace in my life.