Wednesday, February 23, 2005

extra-marital affairs

i attended a sexual ethics seminar today. the purpose of the seminar was to uncover potential issues for clergy with extra-marital affairs and other crossings of relational boundaries.

the speaker stated that a leading reason for extra-marital affairs is one of the spouses feels like the other spouse is acting like a parent to them. in other words, a wife feels like her husband is treating her like her father treated her or a husband feels like his wife is treating him like his mother treated him.

the speaker posited that the husband would automatically lose feelings of affection for the wife because he would group his wife in the same emotional category as his mother. (or other way if you start with the wife).

i think the married men walked out wondering if they were treating their wives like their their wife's dad and the married women walked out wondering if they were treating their husbands like their husband's mom...

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